For Grace, Not Despair

O Lord, rebuke me not in Your wrath,

And chasten me not in Your burning anger.

For Your arrows have sunk deep into me,

And Your hand has pressed down on me.

There is no soundness in my flesh because of Your indignation;

There is no health in my bones because of my sin.

For my iniquities are gone over my head;

As a heavy burden they weigh too much for me.

Psalm 38:1-4

There have been times in my walk with Christ where the Holy Spirit makes me aware of a boatload of sinful tendencies all at one time. Discontentment, ungodly easily provoked anger, lack of self-control, self-centeredness, selfishness, lack of love, gluttony, ungratefulness, unbridled tongue, bitterness, resentment and pride. Any attempts to repent and overcome these sins in order to walk in holiness by my own strength utterly fails. At this, a new temptation arises - despair. But the Holy Spirit does not make me aware of these things to cause me despair - He does it so that I will repent, yes, but rely on His strength through the grace of Jesus Christ instead of my own human efforts at behavior modification. It's kind of like a heightened sense of what some unrepentant people think before they can come to Christ, "Let me get my life together first - then I'll come to Christ." But the Gospel is not about behavior modification, that's the business of psychologists. Christ takes utterly useless, wickedly abased people and transforms them into vessels of mercy for His glory. He is in the business of heart transformation.

Repentance is still important for the daily practice of walking in the holiness and righteousness of Christ, but the crucial thing to remember is to rely totally on the grace of God and not mere human strength and human effort. The divine spiritual realm is needed to overcome the physical stronghold of sin. What is spiritual created everything that's physical - what awesome power lies in the hands of our Great God! How then could I possibly rely on physical strength and fallen human will to accomplish a divine work begun and completed in the Spirit?!

Wretched woman that I am! Who will set me free from this body of death?

Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!

Romans 7:24-25

When Satan tempts me to despair

and tells me of the guilt within

Upward I look and see Him there

Who made an end of all my sin.

Because the sinless Savior died,

My sinful soul is counted free

For God the Just is satisfied

to look on Him and pardon me.